free fall into the unknown

Trust in the Lord with all your heart…” Proverbs 3.5heart-of-god

Nothing in life is a guarantee. There is no guarantee that I’ll be here tomorrow. There is no guarantee that my plan to go to the gym this afternoon will come to fruition. This includes any dreams I have; any hopes I have for my future. The only guarantee I have is that I get to spend eternity with the God who created all I see; the One who created me and knows me…intimately. Thinking about that one word freaks me out…just a little. Okay. I’ll be honest. It freaks me out a lot and yet, I find it comforting. He knows every little minute detail about me. My faults. My passions. My desires. My every need. My thoughts. Every. Thing.

And yet…

yet…

He loves me.

His Word proves that:
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.You discern my going out and my lying down;you are familiar with all my ways…Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Psalm 139.1-6

I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. Jeremiah 31.3

He. loves. me.

…just as I am. But He loves me too much to leave me there.

I can’t help but ask:

Will I trust that He has my best interest in mind?

Will I trust in His goodness?

Will I be okay if my dreams never come to fruition?

Will I continue to trust in His goodness; accepting the next step in the dance of this Divine Romance as it comes?

Recently, I’ve found myself in the midst of a possible change in my life…a small adventure, really, at the moment. It’s something new…

something mysterious…

something profound…

something beautiful…and a little terrifying.

I won’t delve more into that, for now. Just know that I’m being tested, in a good way…and, to you, my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ: please lift this little adventure up in prayer. God knows I need it; all parties involved do.

I was pouring over Jeremiah 29, among other portions of scripture, during my devotional time this morning: ”’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you…I will be found by you.” I’ve been aspiring to take comfort in those words; in that love, trusting that He holds my tomorrow and striving to keep my heart hidden in Him.

I’ve come to take comfort in the following:

The Lord is righteous in all His ways and loving toward all He has made. The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear Him; He hears their cry and saves them. Psalm 145.17-19

“…Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?” Hebrews 13.5b

I do not know what tomorrow holds, much less the next minute. But I do know that God will be there in that next moment; in my next breath; covering my tomorrow. In that, I will trust. In that, I will fall. He’ll either catch me or give me wings to fly.

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